Hello fans and fellow blood bowlers its that time of the year again! Kick off on a fresh season of Nuffle Be Praised Pro! I'm you faithful ghoul Crypt Collinsworth and I'm here with our first edition of Inside The NBP for Season 2!
We've got a lot of great news and NBP action to bring you tonight. We have recaps of all the matches, our Players of the Week, our injury report, and a peak into the results of the first round of the Ronnie Rott Invitational Tournament!
We are also proud to announce that we have added Ronnie Rott as a full time correspondent here on CabalTV! Word has it he is making more than even Howard Co-Hell but I'll let Howard complain about that one! Let's get things off to a rotten start as I send you over to The man himself or at least what's left of him Mr. Ronnie Rott!
Thank you Crypt! I'm decomposing with joy to be a part of the NBP broadcast team. I want to thank all my fans for sending Nurgle's Rot infected flesh to the NBP offices! Your letters got me here so thank you!
Before we get into the pro recaps for the week, let's first take a brief look at the first round results of the Ronnie Rott Invitational! We had some crazy match ups this week, including more than one overtime match a first for NBP history! In the end the Undead had the slight advantage winning 5 matches, to 3 matches for the Necromantics. Here are the results!
Bone Voyage 4 W vs Beware My Claw L
The Undead Queens 2 W vs Munster Show 1 L
Monstrosities of The Deep 2 W vs Shake Shamble 'n' Stroll 1 L
NBP Restless Dread 2 W vs Nightmare Syndrome 0 L
The Burnt Legion 0 L vs Clan Giovanni 5 W
Late to Rise 2 W vs No Bones to Go On 0 L
Rigorously Morted 2 W vs Das Slaytonic Wehrmacht 1 L
The Family Addams 2 W vs The Monster Squad 1 L
The second round of the tournament will be one for the ages; the elite 8 of Undead and Necromantic teams will further mangle themselves for your enjoyment! We will be back after these messages.
Now we move on to our match recaps! As always we start in our Eastern Conference, first we look into the Tar and Feather Division, where Eastern Conference Champion and season one runner up DaltMC's Drunken dwarves #Swole threw down with new coach Blue6Maxx's Skaven menace Gremlins 2! #Swole expertly played the 2 to 1 grind and handed Gremlins 2 a loss in their debut match!
In the other Tar and Feather Match up Snakbar7's undead Rolling Bones took on Stimee's Strong Bad's Awesome Team. Though they had possession and an an opportunity to score multiple times, The Awesome Team couldn't deal with Rolling Bones mummies one of whom scored a touchdown, and what should have been a 1 to 1 draw became a 2 to 1 win for Rolling Bones off an unlikely Ghoul pass and Wight catch to end the game.
We move onto the Deep Dark Division where in our first match up CommieCOZY's new Wood Elf Squad Prong Crags Pronghorn clashed with Eastern Conference finalist Bortbot18 and The Goth Bondage Party. In an one-sided bloody affair featuring no less than 7 casualties on the Pronghorns side, the intrepid elves managed to secure a 2 to 2 tie as time expired while Goth Bondage Party was scoring the tying touchdown.
In the other contest in the Deep Dark Division Hezekiah87 returns with The Green Plague to take on new coach TheRebelKnight's Norse Squad Loki's Toys! Green Plague got back to their winning ways dispatching Loki's toys 2 to 0 and handing Loki's Toys their first loss.
Next we head over to the Western Conference and The Anarchy and Ale Division where in our first match MarioGodzilla's Sticks and Stones took on new coach SCBare's undead squad Slingers. Sticks and Stones came into the game with 5 journey-elves, but were unable to deal with the bash strength of Slingers, losing 2 to 1 in a tough contest.
In our other match up returning champion Midway_Monster01's Varangian Guard took on Jonnymal's Springfield Atoms. In one of the perennial rivalries of NBP, neither team could get the edge with a 1 to 1 tie. This rivalry is far from over, will the next game in the series have larger implications?
Now we move onto The Salt Works where MrB1129's undead Club27 clashed with ChaseJJ's undead The Dead Men of Dunharrow. In a game where all the injuries and failed regenerations were one sided Club27 took advantage of Nuffle's Grace and scored 4 unanswered touchdowns including 3 by Gene Wilder!
In the other showdown of Salt Works new Coach DKMx4xBAMA and his Thetan 2nd Coming had a lizard on lizard clash with veteran and Blurst of The Blurst winner Dymntd and his new lizard squad The Dumpster Diving Lizards! Dymntd showed this season he does not want to be relegated to the Blurst of The Blurst as Dumpster Diving Lizards came out on top 2 to 0.
Now I'm so thrilled to be moving over to our brand new Conference in Nuffle Be Praised, NBP Europa! We start off with the Old World Division where Fantasticdrj's chaos team Dangerous Warriors took on veteran and Mediocre Mega Bowl winner Josiah_Frost's Pax Romana. In a game full of bashing on both sides, neither team got the edge leading to a 1 to 1 tie.
In our other match up of The Old World Mickrob35's Skaven Brittany Privateers 2 took on Obsy's High elf Dungeon and Dragqueens. In a match full of skaven shenanigans but not so much elf shenanigans, The Privateers won 3 to 0.
Now we move to Beheaded Kings where in our first match up new coach Jonah2005uk's wood elves Tree Huggers Affiliated took on DoublePastis new Chaos Squad Kiss of Death. In a back and forth affair that could have gone either way, Kiss of Death were able to pull out the 2 to 1 victory.
In our last match up DJYBee233's Lizard Squad Bootsers took on Just_Stevie13's Humans The Rockport Redbacks. Another tough match up where neither team could press the advantage leading to a 1 to 1 tie.
That does it for the match recaps of the week, I want to thank NBP again for hiring me on and let's send it back over to Crypt!
Great job Ronnie! What great action kick off week in NBP. Let's send things over now to John Maddening with the Players of the Week!
Thank you Crypt! John Maddening here fans and let's get right down to the dirt. This season we have a change in the player of the week. Because we have three conferences now, we will pick a player in each conference to be player of the conference we will then select League Player of the Week from the three winners of the conference players of the week! Let's get down to it!
First up in our Eastern Conference we have a drunken dwarf that is no stranger to player of the week honors. I am of course talking about Abroham “Drinking” Lincoln of #Swole who scored 2 touchdowns in #Swole's beat down of Gremlins 2.
Next up we head over to the Western Conference where we award the player of the week to Club27's Gene Wilder who scored 3 defensive touchdowns, in Club27's one-sided victory over The Dead Men of Dunharrow.
In our Europa Conference the player of the week award goes to Lhyda Dresseur from Brittany Privateers 2! Lhyda earned the honors with a 2 touchdown performance in week one.
I think it's probably pretty obvious who is going to take home the award for Player of The League week one, but I am contractually obligated to say it anyway. The Award goes to Gene Wilder! For his 3 touchdown performance!
That wraps it up for the players of the week, let's send it over to Crypt.
Thank you John! It's getting to that time in the recap. The fans blood lust is needs to be satisfied. Well I won't hold them off any longer let's send it over to Howard Co-Hell and the Week 1 Injury Report!
Thank you Crypt, hello fans this is Howard Co-Hell and even though I'm disgusted that Ronnie Rott somehow got the job I was in line for nonetheless I'm here to bring you the injury report. You know how it works by now, we order the injuries by severity, from badly hurts, to miss next games, to niggling injuries, permanent stat downs and then DEATH. Let's take a look
Badly Hurt – John Lennon and Stevie Ray Vaughn from Rolling Bones; Mickey Mouse, Mr Jingles, Remy, and Biggy Rat from Gremlins 2;Eilifbera from Loki's Toys;Gaussron, Aethyth, Berethator Uhlsnor, and Celinil from Pine Crags Pronghorn;The Beholder from Goth Bondage Party;Limbchewer from Slingers, Dehhair (journeyelf) and Halalu from Sticks and Stones;Herger and Eerikki from Varangian Guard;Stan “The Boy” Taylor From Springfield Atoms; Vansaar from Dead Men of Dunharrow; Xenu from The Theten Second Coming; Hobo 2 From Dumpster Diving Lizards;Trajan and Claudius from Pax Romana; Sidhondur Attaren from Dungeon and Dragqueens;Coehenla and Trieleyl from Treehugers Affiliated; Quetouaqslat and Gortlit from Bootsers.
Miss Next Game – Rilost from Pine Crags Pronghorn; Tsays and Quelut from Brittany Privatteers 2; Brole0Gor from Kiss of Death; Fyanfel from Treehuggers Affiliated; Utecwaq from Bootsers;
Niggling Injury – Glorlun (Journeyelf) Sticks and Stones; Al'nor from Treehuggers Affiliated.
Permanent Stat Downs – Mighty Mouse from Gremlins 2 Armour Value Down, Unnr Vigfussson with movement down, Naelendil from Sticks and Stones with Armour Value Down.
Death – Spike from Gremlins 2; Ikabod Dorson from Loki's Toys; Cthedor from Pine Crags Pronghorn; Chessyth (Journeyelf) from Sticks and Stones; Orlock and Wight King from The Dead Men of Dunharrow; Butters from Dangerous Warriors; Horthborn from Dungeon and Dragqueens.
Wow that sure was a lot of carnage folks! Now to finish off the week one recap we have of course our award from bloodies game of the week. While there were a few decent candidates the award goes to the match with the most injuries which this week was the Pine Crags Pronghorn vs Goth Bondage Party. Though the injuries were very one-sided it still counts.
That does it for this week one edition of Inside the NBP! For Crypt Collinsworth, Ronnie Rott and John Maddening I'm Howard Co-Hell thanks for tuning in and always remember to Praise Nuffle!